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Mother of Kid Who Committed Suicide After Bullying Wants Action…

9:13 pm - 04/14/2009

Mother of Kid Who Committed Suicide After Bullying Wants Action

The Advocate talks to Sirdeaner Walker, the mother of Carl Joseph Walker-Hoover, the 11-year-old student who killed himself last week following relentless bullying at school:

Walker "On April 6, Sirdeaner Walker came home, walked up the stairs to the second floor of her home, and saw her son suspended from a support beam in the stairwell, swaying slightly in the air, an extension cord wrapped around his neck, according to police. He apologized in a suicide note, told his mother that he loved her, and left his video games to his brother.

Walker said her son had been the victim of bullying since the beginning of the school year, and that she had been calling the school since September, complaining that her son was mercilessly teased. He played football, baseball, and was a boy scout, but a group of classmates called him gay and teased him about the way he dressed. They ridiculed him for going to church with his mother and for volunteering locally.

"It's not just a gay issue," Walker said. "It’s bigger. He was 11 years old, and he wasn't aware of his sexuality. These homophobic people attach derogatory terms to a child who’s 11 years old, who goes to church, school, and the library, and he becomes confused. He thinks, Maybe I'm like this. Maybe I'm not. What do I do?"

Walker is demanding action from the school. At this point it's what she has left.

lizzy_someone 15th-Apr-2009 01:23 am (UTC)
They ridiculed him for going to church with his mother and for volunteering locally.

God, it's bad enough they bullied him for stupid harmless things like the way he dressed, but that they also bullied him for doing something really good like volunteering -- that's just -- like, WTF is wrong with the human race.
generationlol 15th-Apr-2009 01:28 am (UTC)
Seriously, wtf. Absolutely sickening.

This story gets more heart-wrenching every time I read about it. He apologized & left his video games to his brother? And that picture. Ugh, it's almost unbearable.
sunoftheskye 15th-Apr-2009 01:31 am (UTC)
left his video games to his brother

God I feel sick. :(
loonylolydarko 15th-Apr-2009 02:26 am (UTC)
mte this is sick
nikoel 15th-Apr-2009 04:33 pm (UTC)
The majority has just gotten so out of touch with their supposed Christian values. Kids pick up on everything and generally do what their parents do.
laurie_springs 15th-Apr-2009 01:25 am (UTC)
Oh my God.

This story is just the ulitmate of lows. I want to know what assholes were raising these bullies-they got that shit from somewhere.
danceprincess20 15th-Apr-2009 01:28 am (UTC)
Every time I hear more about this or see that picture it just breaks me heart. I'm in a place right now where I'm seeing the good in people every day (I'm interning at a non profit) and I was just starting to feel like the world might be okay and then something like this happens.
recycleanimals 15th-Apr-2009 01:29 am (UTC)
This makes me just want to cry. I know kids are cruel, but really? I'm glad the bullies have to spend the rest of their lives knowing they caused someone to kill himself.

Edited at 2009-04-15 01:29 am (UTC)
box_in_the_box 15th-Apr-2009 02:02 am (UTC)
I'm not glad about that, if only because I wonder whether the bullies might actually be PROUD of driving this poor kid to commit suicide.

At the very least, that's gotta increase their fear factor when they bully OTHER kids - "The last kid we picked on, we made so miserable that HE KILLED HIMSELF, so you'd better not make us mad."
recycleanimals 15th-Apr-2009 02:05 am (UTC)
Yeah. that's true. A lot of kids bully out of peer pressure or insecurities about themselves, so I'm just hoping they possess some ounce of humanity that makes them feel guilty for this.

Edited at 2009-04-15 02:06 am (UTC)
box_in_the_box 15th-Apr-2009 02:08 am (UTC)
You're more of an optimist than I am.
evilgmbethy 15th-Apr-2009 11:50 am (UTC)
The piece they did on AC360 last night showed the mother looking through a book his classmates had made and at least one girl apologized for making fun of him.

Doesn't bring this adorable little boy back, but at least that one girl was willing to own her actions.
nikoel 15th-Apr-2009 04:40 pm (UTC)
Not to mention future psychological issues those kids will face. Most of them will probably not even realize where the anger is coming from, won't deal with it and will probably take it out on their families.
boyracer1211 15th-Apr-2009 12:52 pm (UTC)
I doubt those kids will even care. :(
sparkly_stuff 15th-Apr-2009 01:30 am (UTC)
This is so heartbreaking.

And you know the parents of these bullies won't make their kids take any responsibility...they'll just say "KIDZ WILL BE KIDZ THEY ARE INNOCENT LITTLE SNOWFLAKES"
spiffystuff 15th-Apr-2009 01:46 am (UTC)
Or they'll say "WELL THE SCHOOL SHOULD HAVE DONE SOMETHING (something that didn't involve doing anything to mah spechul snowflakes)"
angry_chick 15th-Apr-2009 01:33 am (UTC)
I know that the parents of these kids are going to say "My child is a good person."

No. Your child is not a good person. Your kid is a premature drain on society and they need to be put away just like an adult would be put away for the same shit.
angry_chick 15th-Apr-2009 01:54 am (UTC)
I guess I'm just extremely sick and tired of the bullshit. Kids do pick up cues from adults, but kids need to learn that if they pick up a cue that is absolutely harmful to someone else, they need to be punished for it. I know it sounds very authoritarian, but the adults that taught the kids this should get in some serious legal trouble and the kids should too.
limegreenl1ght 15th-Apr-2009 03:47 am (UTC)
i agree with you. as terrible as the result of their actions can be, bullies aren't necessarily sociopaths who need to be locked away with no sympathy. i kinda pity them more than anything.
angry_chick 15th-Apr-2009 04:08 am (UTC)
You have my total agreement.

I'm pretty misanthropic, so I have a general distrust of other people. But my hat certainly goes off to you for being in education.
shuraiya 15th-Apr-2009 01:38 am (UTC)
This is horrific, it's just-- these children are the future of our world. I can't even imagine how they'll be when they're adults. :(
magenter 15th-Apr-2009 01:51 am (UTC)
Geez, I didn't feel like crying till I read this comment. Now I'm thinking about all the stuff I wish I could say to him or kids like him to convince him it'd be okay ;_;
dartemis24 15th-Apr-2009 01:59 am (UTC)
... aaand here comes the tears.
dartemis24 15th-Apr-2009 02:01 am (UTC)
>left video games to his brother

...That seems so... real. Fuck, this is really messed up.
randomneses 15th-Apr-2009 02:05 am (UTC)
I wonder how this bb dressed.
snowe 15th-Apr-2009 02:11 am (UTC)
That picture makes me tear up every time.
aishiteru 15th-Apr-2009 02:21 am (UTC)
Honestly, I feel bad for all of the kids in this story, though obviously Carl most of all. But one has to doubt those other 11 year old boys really knew what the words they were saying meant and what effect they would have. When you're that age, bad words are bad, you don't know why they're bad -- maybe you have some vague idea, but you don't really understand the implications of calling someone "gay" until you understand sexuality, and at age 11 that's not really going to happen. These kids are just regurgitating the hate they hear without understanding it at all, I bet.

And now these kids will have to grow up knowing another boy is dead because of them. Where were their parents? Where were their teachers? Where was ANYONE who should have been intervening and teaching these kids the inappropriateness of what they were saying? Of course there's an extent to which they're responsible for their own actions - they didn't HAVE to bully Carl - but there was obviously a clear lack of guidance going on here, or this wouldn't have happened.

But god, this poor boy. I can't even imagine what his mother is going through. ): Good on her for fighting back.
chantalzola 15th-Apr-2009 02:23 am (UTC)
Poor child. Poor, poor child.

I can't help it, that face.
nope_de_plume 15th-Apr-2009 02:25 am (UTC)
When I first heard the story, it was plain sad, but actually seeing a picture of the kid makes me want to cry.
requinnn 15th-Apr-2009 03:28 am (UTC)
OMG, that is so sad. I can't imagine feeling so hopeless at such a young age, Poor thing, his poor mother. :'(

I hope SOMETHING good comes out of this.
flirflir 15th-Apr-2009 04:30 am (UTC)
this is just heartbreaking :(
burntblueseason 15th-Apr-2009 04:40 am (UTC)
This story makes me heartsick. Many, many thoughts of peace & comfort to his mother & loved ones.
homasse 15th-Apr-2009 04:45 am (UTC)
I hate stories like this. I just do. So fucking much. It reminds me of why I hate people so much.
la_raisondetre 15th-Apr-2009 05:45 am (UTC)
This is fucking disgusting, if you'll excuse my language.
openpick 15th-Apr-2009 06:48 am (UTC)
That is completely heartbreaking.
lisaee 15th-Apr-2009 10:57 am (UTC)
This is heart breaking and horrible.

On another note, at that age I was being bullied for being a suspected lesbian/volunteering/having a slightly out of the ordinary family. Even when my hair was almost set on fire and I was being borderline sexually harassed every other lesson, the teachers just used to ~kids will be kids~ line, and treated it like it was nothing. I personally went down the eating issues and constant crying route, but it could have been a lot worse had I now been used to that kind of treatment.

Someone should be telling teenagers that saying things like that really isn't acceptable, because people aren't always as invulnerable as you think they are. It's only when tragedies like this occur that people finally start to wake up to the scale of the issues at hand.
evilgmbethy 15th-Apr-2009 11:45 am (UTC)
They did a piece on this on AC360 last night and that's where I learned that the boy's mother is a survivor of both breast cancer and homelessness, and I started crying all over again. This poor woman. Life really takes a huge, steaming dump on some people.
rawbery79 15th-Apr-2009 03:16 pm (UTC)
Oh God...

That's just...that's fucked. I don't know how she is managing to deal with all this.
evilgmbethy 15th-Apr-2009 03:19 pm (UTC)
She seemed surprisingly together. I mean, I'm sure she's absolutely wrecked but I got the impression that she is a very strong woman.
trustingno1 15th-Apr-2009 01:29 pm (UTC)
They ridiculed him for going to church with his mother and for volunteering locally.

I have. No words. He sounds like a great kid.
watermeloncholy 15th-Apr-2009 07:36 pm (UTC)
He looks like such a sweet kid...this hurts my heart.

This is exactly why I'm never having kids. I wouldn't want to expose them to all shit in humanity. I'm so done with people.
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