ONTD Political

Dr. Phil’s Oral Sex After School Special

3:16 am - 12/16/2009
A naive preteen girl, one who still sings along with Radio Disney and worships Hello Kitty is not so innocent once she gets to school. There, she follows a male classmate into the restroom, or hides at recess or lunch and engages in oral sex. This is what Dr. Phil, television’s ultimate family expert, wants parents to think.

Erica, a 19-year-old student, says he’s got it all wrong.

“My first experience wasn’t like that at all. It didn’t happen at school. I was 17 and it was at the house of the guy I was dating. We were just making out and then he asked me if I would do that, but he wasn’t forcing it on me,” she says.

She doesn’t believe what Dr. Phil is saying is entirely true.

“On his show, he says a girl is ‘on her knees in a bathroom,’ going down on a guy. While I think that has probably happened, in all of the stories I have heard from friends, there’s never been one where a middle school kid was doing that,” she says. “I feel like most of us didn’t even know what that was back then.”

Girls who engage in oral sex are bad girls, Dr. Phil implies. But surveys conducted by the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention and first person accounts reveal that most young women who are going down are doing it for their own reasons, not to get attention. And most of them are not doing it in school bathroom stalls, either. Check any online teen health message board, like Oprah’s community message board — it seems that most teens are engaging in oral in their bedroom, or in the bedroom of their partner, not on the streets. “It’s not so difficult to do that you have to resort to doing it at school.” Erica says. “There are lots of opportunities outside of that.”

But it seems in nearly every case, the girl still gets the blame for the activity.

Dr. Phil hopes to “protect our daughters from giving blow jobs,” yet he says nothing about concern or responsibility regarding teenage boys. Little does he realize that boys are giving (and obviously getting) as well.

In an article from the Washington Post, Jennifer Manlove, who directs fertility research for the organization Child Trends, says that guys give as often as girls.

“You assume that females are more likely to give, males more likely to receive,” she says. “We were surprised that the percentages were similar.”

Whatever the cause for rate increases in oral sex – whether it’s because teens openly express their sexual behavior more often now, or because it’s perceived as “safer sex,” the jury is out. But the next time Dr. Phil wants to blame the girls, he should address the fact that guys are equal participants.

Source
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___closetome 16th-Dec-2009 12:22 pm (UTC)
Idk I still feel that young teenage girls (13+) are pressured to give blowjobs WAY MORE than boys that age are pressured to eat pussy. Or is it just me?
hourglasscreate 16th-Dec-2009 12:46 pm (UTC)
I don't see how you could know that. I can see how you might think it, but unless you have done research, you really can't know it.

I also think there is a point you are missing in this article. You are using the word, 'pressured'. When what the researchers are finding is that the girls do it for their own reasons. Frankly, if you want to avoid the 9-month flu, oral sex is a lot more attractive than regular sex.
jaguarjg 16th-Dec-2009 12:28 pm (UTC)
I hate Doctor Phil. What kind of name is that anyway? Shame on you Oprah for giving this tool a platform.
squeeful 16th-Dec-2009 12:32 pm (UTC)
Phil McGraw is ineffectual, bombastic, judgmental, sexist, and an ass.
preciosatt 16th-Dec-2009 12:32 pm (UTC)
My BFF works in a secondary school and the horror stories she tells me make me cringe.

Why are 12 year olds having sex in the bathroom? Why are teenagers making sex tapes? And the number of cases of statutory rape is alarming.
ceilidh_ann 16th-Dec-2009 12:42 pm (UTC)
Apparently those who are taught abstinence only sex education are more likely to do oral or anal sex instead.

Dr Phil sounds like a jackass who's a little out of touch with reality.
hourglasscreate 16th-Dec-2009 12:48 pm (UTC)
Apparently those who are taught abstinence only sex education are more likely to do oral or anal sex instead.

That makes sense. Because one sure way of getting caught is to get pregnant. If you don't get pregnant, you can pretend to still be a virgin.
salienne 16th-Dec-2009 12:44 pm (UTC)
Ugh, can Dr. Phil just go away already? He gives everyone in the mental health profession a bad name.
lastrega 16th-Dec-2009 12:44 pm (UTC)
None of this really addresses the big question: Why is Dr Phil such a giant freaking douchebag?
sanglupa 16th-Dec-2009 04:38 pm (UTC)
-cracks up- this!!!
shopaholism 16th-Dec-2009 12:46 pm (UTC)
I knew a bunch of guys/girls who did inappropriate shit during middle school. A couple of the most notorious instances were A) a guy brought two girls into the bathroom where they proceeded to strip while he took pictures and B) a guy got head from two girls at the same time in a bathroom stall. bleughghlskdjfs.

On an somewhat unrelated note, in that same middle school, the janitor caught a couple of kids scurrying into the ceiling through the tiles in the boy's bathroom. Upon further investigation, they found a huge stash of pot up there. Apparently kids had been smoking pot in the ceiling for over a decade before the spot was discovered. I find this sort of awesome. ~only in middle school~
doctoreon 16th-Dec-2009 08:45 pm (UTC)
a guy brought two girls into the bathroom where they proceeded to strip while he took pictures

I knew a guy who did that in high school. He also made a lot of copies of those pictures.
sparkindarkness 16th-Dec-2009 12:50 pm (UTC)
It's sad that he's slut shaming like this and addeing into the blame and shame culture women face in an attempt to score sensationalist points
jorajo 16th-Dec-2009 01:27 pm (UTC)
And yes, so much this.
anythingbutgrey 16th-Dec-2009 01:22 pm (UTC)
Dr. Phil hopes to “protect our daughters from giving blow jobs,”

sit down, shut up, read a book.

as for middle schoolers performing oral sex in bathrooms, i went to religious jewish day school where boys and girls wouldn't even shake hands, so i'm no expert on any of this. but if that were to be a common occurrence, which i don't believe it is, perhaps dr. i-assaulted-my-patients phil would be better off analyzing the social pressures that compel women to be sexual before they personally are ready, not deeming all girls to be unprepared to make decisions about their sexual activity by the mere fact that they have vaginas and must be protected.

Edited at 2009-12-16 01:25 pm (UTC)
jorajo 16th-Dec-2009 01:26 pm (UTC)
The thought of Dr. Phil discussing oral sex makes me want to scrub my brain with lye.

That said, when I was middle school age, I don't know that any of my peers were engaging in anything more than making out and heavy petting. There were probably a few who were, but it seemed to take place mostly away from school. Now trips to competitions and tournaments? Orgies. Basically. But that was when we were in high school. And most of the people I knew were smart enough to keep it on the DL. The kids who graduated about 4 years after me set up their own little brothel in the back of the bus on their senior trip. Classy.
chipuni 17th-Dec-2009 04:59 pm (UTC)
When I was in middle school...

...EVERYONE lied about what they had done.
lroche_nf 16th-Dec-2009 01:33 pm (UTC)
My cousin was known for giving blow jobs as early as Grade 5. She had some issues with love (she was passed around from foster home to foster home until my aunt adopted her when she was like 9). I don't think its a common thing.

There are lots of kids who are sexually active earlier now. Parents need to start talking about sex (including oral sex) to their children earlier than they do. Waiting until they are 13 is too late. Often times girls give in to sexual pressure due to low self esteem (like my cousin).
sunshinedan 16th-Dec-2009 02:01 pm (UTC)
Dr. Phil hopes to “protect our daughters from giving blow jobs,”
Sing it to attack of the killer tomatoes.
URGENT!
Girls blowing too young too often could cause teeth to come in improperly and then they'd need braces, but you don't have healthcare anymore (thanks Joe) and so you have to sell your daughters preteen blowjobs on the street to old men and that makes Jesus cry and your whole family goes to hell and OMG WHY DR. PHIL WRRRRYYY!!!
slickdbackburns 16th-Dec-2009 02:16 pm (UTC)
veritasera 16th-Dec-2009 02:52 pm (UTC)
omg what is this
chasingtides 16th-Dec-2009 02:16 pm (UTC)
Dr. Phil hopes to “protect our daughters from giving blow jobs,”

And let's protect our sons from getting them, yeah?

When I was in junior high, it was a big deal that I slow danced with a boy. On the other hand, there was one girl who was known for offering oral sex to the boys. But she was also known for having other, serious issues.
bushy_brow 16th-Dec-2009 02:42 pm (UTC)
Jennifer Manlove, who directs fertility research for the organization Child Trends

...If my name were "Manlove," I'm afraid I would have to stay as far away from any profession involving sexuality as it was possible to stay.

That said, Dr. Phil can STFD and STFU.
bagelofdeath 16th-Dec-2009 02:48 pm (UTC)
I can't take the fear-mongering with sex. It was like when they claimed every teen was going to "rainbow parties" and then it was pretty much shown that...it maybe happened a couple times.

As my professor was always saying, "Every generation likes to think it invented sex". Instead of acting like this is the plague and trying to tell everybody in the world that THEIR TEENS ARE DOING THIS ALL THE TIME MAYBE RIGHT NOW, focus on educating them about sex and, further, focus on building self-esteem in young people. The problem isn't the idea of giving or getting a blow-job or having sex, it's about not understanding it and feeling pressured into doing something they don't want to do.
orcasandowls 16th-Dec-2009 03:20 pm (UTC)
A+
oh_medicate_me 16th-Dec-2009 03:25 pm (UTC)
Doctor Phil is such a hack.
iolarah 16th-Dec-2009 03:46 pm (UTC)
Dr. Phil got it wrong?? What a surprise!

/sarcasm
queenweasley 16th-Dec-2009 03:47 pm (UTC)
“On his show, he says a girl is ‘on her knees in a bathroom,’ going down on a guy. While I think that has probably happened, in all of the stories I have heard from friends, there’s never been one where a middle school kid was doing that,” she says. “I feel like most of us didn’t even know what that was back then.”

Maybe kids at my middle school were just ~unusually experienced~ but I definitely knew what oral sex was in middle school and I definitely knew there were kids who were doing it (and more).

Anyway, let's stop focusing completely on girls and expect some accountability from the boys. I suppose that's too much to ask, though.
chibi_pink 16th-Dec-2009 04:02 pm (UTC)
I'm a chick and I love to give my partner oral sex. yeah... I'm SO bad. whatever.
schonste 16th-Dec-2009 04:32 pm (UTC)
It's funny, because I was just talking to a friend of mine the other day (who is rabidly anti-drug, despite her close friends enjoying pot once a week or so) and she said it was ~weird~ how no shows about middle schoolers or teenagers ever focused on them taking DRUGS! I mean, that's a huge part of kids' lives, isn't it??

And I said, well, no, it's not? And she smirked at me like, yeah right, as if you would know, sssssssssstoner.

I bet Dr. Phil hates blowjobs.
dayumsam 16th-Dec-2009 06:48 pm (UTC)
I'm not anti-drugs in a lot of senses of the word, but in my experience kids in my town have at least been smoking pot and drinking since the 5th grade. I'd say it's not something that affects a lot of middle schoolers, but it's definitely there.
trialia 16th-Dec-2009 04:51 pm (UTC)
“You assume that females are more likely to give, males more likely to receive,” she says. “We were surprised that the percentages were similar.”
Oh PLEASE. No guy I've ever been with was enthusiastic about going down on me or any other woman, but they sure wanted it themselves...
layweed 16th-Dec-2009 05:00 pm (UTC)
Why you all hating on Dr. Phil? I bet he just feels left out that nobody wants to give him a blow job.

=X
iweep4u 16th-Dec-2009 05:17 pm (UTC)
Lol XD
violetrose 16th-Dec-2009 05:05 pm (UTC)
I was only a teen a few years ago, and I don't really remember anyone does this sort-of thing. Of course, there is a lot of pressure on teenagers, particularly teenage girls, to have sex, because if you don't, you're pathetic and no one will love you, or something. But remember, if you're a girl and like it, you're a slut.

Also, I'll be hopping onto the Dr Phil hate bandwagon. He's an arse.
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