ONTD Political

GOP's Wet Dream: Censoring Reality!

1:54 am - 02/14/2012
Finally, We Can Censor that Potty Mouth Webster and His Obscene Dictionaries (and His TV Show Too!).

Arizona Bill Would Likely Prohibit Teachers And Professors From Teaching Any Book With ‘Profanity’

A new bill in Arizona is seeking to impose harsh restrictions on teachers’ conduct, even in their own homes. The bill, SB 1467, states that educators at the state’s public schools and universities can be fined, suspended and ultimately fired if they “engage in speech or conduct that would violate the standards adopted by the Federal Communications Commission concerning obscenity, indecency and profanity if that speech or conduct were broadcast on television or radio.”

That does a great deal to limit what can be taught in classrooms. Banning books is certainly not a new practice, but this law would cover far more than controversial books. Here’s a look at some of the key books that would be outlawed in Arizona classrooms:

Worse, as Angus Johnston notes, the bill is so ineptly drafted that it could intrude deeply into teacher’s private lives. SB 1467 doesn’t just ban public speech or conduct, but all speech and conduct. That means public school teachers in Arizona will be forbidden from engaging in any FCC-regulated activities no matter where they are. That means no sex, no going to the bathroom, no cursing and no showering. Ever.

One of the bill’s five sponsors, State Senator Lori Klein (R-AZ), has some experience in the national spotlight. Last summer she raised eyebrows when, during an interview with a reporter from the Arizona Republic, she took out a loaded handgun and pointed it at the reporter’s chest. And in the middle of Herman Cain’s sexual harassment scandal, Klein dismissed the allegations against Cain because he had “never been anything but a gentlemen” to her, “and I am not an unattractive woman.”

Arizona Law SB 1467 Would Make It Illegal to Teach Law, History, or Literature

Just when you thought the Arizona legislature was out of bad ideas.

SB 1467, newly introduced in the Arizona State Senate, would force schools and universities to suspend, fine, and ultimately fire any teacher or professor who “engage[d] in speech or conduct that would violate the standards adopted by the federal communications commission concerning obscenity, indecency and profanity if that speech or conduct were broadcast on television or radio.”

For the first offense, you’d get a one-week suspension without pay. For the second offense, two weeks. For the third, a pink slip.

As Greg Lukianoff of the Foundation for Individual Rights in Education notes, this law would not only block the teaching of such classics as Ulysses, The Canterbury Tales, and Catcher in the Rye, it’d prohibit historians and law professors from competently discussing campus free speech regulations, since the most important Supreme Court case in that field hinged on a jacket with the slogan “Fuck The Draft” written on it.

It’s also worth noting, as Lukianoff does, that the bill would regulate professors’ actions outside the classroom, which means that merely writing the paragraph above — in a blogpost, a scholarly article, even a private email — would get you suspended.

But it’s even worse than that.

Note the language of the bill: You’re violating the law if you engage “in speech or conduct” that would violate FCC standards if “broadcast on television or radio.” Not public speech or conduct. Speech or conduct, full stop.

If this law passes, it will be illegal for any “person who provides classroom instruction” in the state of Arizona to have sex.

Or pee.


aviv_b 14th-Feb-2012 06:43 pm (UTC)
But...but....The Decameron! Candide! The whole of art history:

from H. Bosch

to Goya

even baby Jesus - OH NOOOZ:

Good news though, you'll still be able to discuss Jeff Koons. Meh.

Edited at 2012-02-14 06:55 pm (UTC)
rimpala 14th-Feb-2012 07:03 pm (UTC)
I dunno, those vacuums look pretty phallic to me...
aviv_b 14th-Feb-2012 07:27 pm (UTC)
Shhhhhh! Don't give away that they are in the midst of their mating ritual. Cause that would really suc.....tion, LOL.
dafairyness 14th-Feb-2012 07:45 pm (UTC)
I laughed a little too hard about that Koons comment. Thanks for that.
aviv_b 14th-Feb-2012 10:19 pm (UTC)
I waited my whole life to go to Versailles. I walk into the first room and was greeted by:


I was not amused.

Edited to add: Ok we've switched to the new format and the insert pic button is gone. What is the code for inserting picture into a message - cause I fail at HTML.

Edited at 2012-02-14 10:21 pm (UTC)
dafairyness 14th-Feb-2012 10:26 pm (UTC)
That's... unexpected.

Ahhhhh more new formats. I only know how to copy and paste from tinypic...
aviv_b 14th-Feb-2012 10:36 pm (UTC)
I'm a masochist so I'm going to try this again:

It worked! I have a Versailles balloon dog!!

Edited at 2012-02-14 10:37 pm (UTC)
girly123 14th-Feb-2012 10:47 pm (UTC)
Not EVEN Koons, considering that a great deal of his work is other people's paintings of his naked porn-star wife doing porny things.
aviv_b 14th-Feb-2012 11:00 pm (UTC)
You're right! They'd have to limit it to Michael Jackson and the chimp, the lobster, and a few others.

Rothko! - Did Rothko do nudes? IDK - never seen any if he did.
girly123 15th-Feb-2012 10:15 pm (UTC)
I think he DID, actually. He would smooth over really detailed paintings to make those fuckawful boring-assed soft-edged boxes, and I'm sure at least one of them was a nude lady or something.

So there's...Pollock. Yay?
wesaucereyes 20th-Feb-2012 02:52 pm (UTC)
hdu, have you seen what those squares are doing to the other squares in his paintings? They might as well sell it to Vivid, it's so pornographic.
aviv_b 20th-Feb-2012 03:03 pm (UTC)
Shhhhh...don't tell!
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