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Politico: PORN PORN PORN

9:52 am - 01/28/2009
Grassley launches porn inquiry



Chuck Grassley knows it when he sees it.

The “it,” of course, is pornography. And Grassley has seen it deep in a demurely titled section of a report from the National Science Foundation — a report that says NSF employees have been spending significant amounts of company time on smut sites and in other explicit pursuits.

Grassley, the ranking member of the Senate Finance Committee, on Tuesday fired off a letter to the NSF’s inspector general requesting all documents related to the “numerous reports” and seven investigations into “Abuse of NSF IT Resources” cited in the foundation’s 68-page semiannual report.

Despite the less-than-lurid sound of the probes, the employees in question weren’t just logging onto their Facebook accounts or buying birthday gifts on Amazon.com. The report says they were watching, downloading and e-mailing porn, sometimes for significant portions of their workdays, and over periods of months or even years.

In one particularly egregious case, the report says one NSF “senior official” was discovered to have spent as much as 20 percent of his working hours over a two-year interval “viewing sexually explicit images and engaging in sexually explicit online ‘chats’ with various women.”

Investigators calculated the value of the time lost at more than $58,000 — for that employee alone.

The foundation has since installed filtering software to prevent employees from accessing inappropriate websites and is currently trying to address the fallout from the agency’s adult-entertainment problem. This includes finding ways to support staffers who were “acutely embarrassed” by the filth-filled environment — like the employee who learned of a co-worker’s adventures in porn via sounds overheard from said co-worker’s computer speakers.

Grassley’s office has asked the foundation to turn over all “specific reports of investigations, audit reports, evaluations and information supporting the examination of the NSF network drive” by Thursday in an effort to “ensure that NSF properly fulfills its mission to strengthen scientific and engineering research, and makes responsible use of the public funding provided for these research disciplines.”

“The semiannual report raises real questions about how the National Science Foundation manages its resources, and Congress ought to demand a full accounting before it gives the agency another $3 billion in the stimulus bill,” Grassley said.

An NSF spokeswoman said the agency had no comment on the report or its content.

Following an initial wave of incidents, the grant-making agency — which has an annual budget of $6.06 billion, and was created by Congress in 1950 to promote the progress of science; advance the national health, prosperity, and welfare; secure the national defense — reveals that probers then “selectively sampled” a single internal server and found even more workers harboring everything from software that can allow users to set up camera-to-camera connections to hard-core images and titillatingly titled bookmarks.

Committee investigators also learned from sources that one employee even had camera-to-camera software to facilitate his on-the-job sexcapades – and that the employee had complained to the IT specialist that his camera was working too slowly.

Pornsauce
rawbery79 28th-Jan-2009 06:00 pm (UTC)
*giggles* Oh, Chuck. YOU know porn when you see it?
nappingathena 28th-Jan-2009 07:39 pm (UTC)
Yes. My first thoght was "Chuck Grassley and porn...my eyes! my eyes!"
schmiss 28th-Jan-2009 06:03 pm (UTC)
o_o

This is a really funny thing to do when you're up for reelection, isn't it?
bagelofdeath 28th-Jan-2009 06:05 pm (UTC)
There's an NSFW joke here.
kitty0_o 28th-Jan-2009 06:14 pm (UTC)
"We put the NSF in NSFW" Y/Y?
bagelofdeath 28th-Jan-2009 06:44 pm (UTC)
I like it. It's simple, but it works.
txvoodoo 29th-Jan-2009 03:15 am (UTC)
beyond that, apparently science makes you horny? ;)
bay_bus_rider 28th-Jan-2009 06:16 pm (UTC)
Well, it's not like scientists had a lot more to do than jack off during the Bush administration...
brassbikini 28th-Jan-2009 06:42 pm (UTC)
lolTHIS.
mlfoley 28th-Jan-2009 06:45 pm (UTC)
you win three free internets!
___closetome 28th-Jan-2009 10:09 pm (UTC)
FTW!
spiffystuff 28th-Jan-2009 06:36 pm (UTC)
>:( This pisses me off. Anyone who spends their work-time on leisure activities ought to be fired, or docked whatever % they didn't work as a % from their salaries.
bagelofdeath 28th-Jan-2009 06:45 pm (UTC)
It might upset you to learn I'm replying to you from work.
mlfoley 28th-Jan-2009 06:46 pm (UTC)
I hope that any other browser tabs consist of porn.
bagelofdeath 28th-Jan-2009 06:51 pm (UTC)
To be honest, porn would actually be more productive than what's actually in my other tabs. Twitter, a recipe for milk chocolate, a national geographic story about elbowed squid and another article about Ortolan, this horrifying French delicacy.

I'm ostensibly a copywriter.
(no subject) - Anonymous
bagelofdeath 28th-Jan-2009 07:31 pm (UTC)
You had best be at work.
ziggyfig 28th-Jan-2009 11:38 pm (UTC)
Ortolan, dear god, why are you reading about that? That has got to be one of the most sadistic dishes in the world. The way it's prepared... -shudders-
schonste 28th-Jan-2009 07:01 pm (UTC)
This is me right now, though my porn is rp. :D
spiffystuff 28th-Jan-2009 07:06 pm (UTC)
As long as you're not working on my dollar, what evs
If you're with the government, then GET BACK TO WORK WHAT ARE YOU DOING OMG WHAT WOULD OBAMA THINK??? ;D
evilgmbethy 28th-Jan-2009 07:29 pm (UTC)
I spend most of every shift surfing LJ. :/

To be fair, I really don't have much to do at my job. I have maybe an hour and a half of work to spread out over an eight hour shift.
hinoema 28th-Jan-2009 06:55 pm (UTC)
Congress ought to demand a full accounting before it gives the agency another $3 billion in the stimulus bill...

FOR PORN!

The Internet...

XD
missanemone OT-ish: To those who've seen "Avenue Q" in the last month28th-Jan-2009 07:06 pm (UTC)
Do they still shout "George Bush" in the final song, "For Now"?
mind_grapes Re: OT-ish: To those who've seen "Avenue Q" in the last month28th-Jan-2009 07:55 pm (UTC)
They selected four winners, and I assume they'll rotate them?

"Recession"
"Prop 8"
"This show"
"Your mother-in-law"

Personally I think "Prop 8" is the best, it has the right rhythm and I hope it will also be temporary.
mind_grapes Re: OT-ish: To those who've seen "Avenue Q" in the last month28th-Jan-2009 07:56 pm (UTC)
I should add that they had a contest where people submitted their ideas, and they premiered them on Inauguration Day :-)
missanemone Re: OT-ish: To those who've seen "Avenue Q" in the last month28th-Jan-2009 09:07 pm (UTC)

Cool! The Prop 8 one is most fitting. The MiL one is too much syllable-wise
surrenderface 28th-Jan-2009 07:18 pm (UTC)
WHY YOU THINK THE NET WAS BORN? PORN, PORN, PORN!
caterfree10 28th-Jan-2009 08:49 pm (UTC)
*facepalm* There is a time and a place for porn, and that is not at work.
watermeloncholy 29th-Jan-2009 01:37 am (UTC)
grab your dick and double-click for porn porn porn!
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